For years, copying other people, I tried to know myself. From within, I couldn’t decide what to do. Unable to see, I heard my name being called. Then I walked outside. ~ Rumi, Open Secret
I took a walk with Grief today.
By turns, he nipped along at my heels and pulled me onward, a mercurial dog that cannot be satisfied at one particular pace.
I tried to bury Grief in the backyard a few nights ago.
It rose up again on the third day.
I made a monument out of Grief last night.
I stood in the gloaming, disappointed. The bathetic obelisk already crumbled before me.
I called Grief up on the phone. I tried to tell her all the things I needed to say. She was so selfish, taking all the attention for herself, and leaving no time for me to discuss the matters at hand.
I took a nap with Grief today.
Our lassitude lasted the better part of the afternoon.
I played hide-and-seek with Grief this afternoon.
He was such a good sport. Couldn’t find him for hours. I finally gave up and went for a walk instead.
I wrote a letter to Grief today. I wanted to burn it, send it away in ritual. Instead, I’m sending it to you…